I discovered “Maps” by the Yeah Yeah Yeahs playing on my TV when I was least expecting it… “Made off, don’t stray. My kind’s your kind, I’ll stay the same. Pack up, don’t stray. Oh say say say, oh say say say… Wait, they don’t love you like I love you. Wait, they don’t love you like I love you…”
I learned some time ago that Chris would have a problem with continuing to date a girl after finding out that she was better than him at sports. This comes down to the fact that if the girl was better than him at tennis, then that’s one game they couldn’t really play for fun. It might either get too competitive or plain boring if she whoops him in every game. I also came to understand that this is a characteristic of most males, especially those who partake in sports. This is quite understandable since it stems from the whole male inferiority complex we have when presented with a potentially stronger woman {gulp}. In a relationship, only one person can wear the pants and every man strives to be that person (Fact: Men wearing skirts are open to ridicule and teasing from their peers everybody).
I do enjoy sports but I’m not madly passionate on them enough to own a top by a football team or any other replica sports gear. This is probably the reason why I’ve never had a problem with such issues and wouldn’t feel insecure about dating a woman who was better than me at sports. To be closer to the truth, I wouldn’t feel insecure about going out with a woman who was better than me at anything, be it leisure or academia. In fact, if she was better than me at anything, it would be more of a turn-on. But obviously not if she was better than me at arm wrestling or pulling coaches. If she was more skilled at peeing whilst standing then that would bother me too.
But joking aside, I found out that most guys think that way with a degree of seriousness. Although many men would drool over the backhand and backside of Anna Kournikova, given the chance to continue dating her and perhaps settle down with her, they’d refuse. She can be a scary woman on the court, but if Enrique wasn’t such a heart throb latino sensation then I think he’d have to come up with new tricks to keep his ego in one piece whilst holding her balls (and racket).
But not all men take pride in their athletic or sporting ability. The men from the joypad generation would agree with me there. For those from the video gaming generation, it would be the ultimate flogging session to get beaten by a girl at video games. Most gamers would love a partner who shared a similar enthusiasm for video games, but would never ever be good enough to beat “number one.” At the same time they’d speak fluent Japanese so that they could translate Final Fantasy X-2 in real time whilst you played it (and do the voices too), because you couldn’t wait for the English version to be released.
After exploring the different angles of this finding, we came to a mutual understanding on a situation that would undoubtedly make a male feel uneasy regardless of his interests. So what is this thing that would create one of the biggest dents in a man’s ego? It’s if the girl is a better driver than the guy in the relationship. But what classifies as a “better” driver? Is it someone who can drive at higher speeds without crashing or causing accidents, or someone who drives at lower speeds without crashing or causing accidents?
Girl: I’m a better driver than you.
Guy (ego senses a rift in the balance and shifts to defensive mode): What are you talking about? I’m a better driver!
Girl: I’m barely able to comprehend what you said, judging from the speeds you drive at.
Guy: It doesn’t mean I’m not in control! Anyway, how is it possible for you to crash when you never drive over 30 mph?
Girl: Women are generally safer drivers because men are generally more aggressive behind the wheel. Hence, I am generally better than you at driving.
Guy: Bullshit! Let’s settle this with a race.
It certainly seems true. Every guy I know claims to be good at driving, even the ones who don’t hold a license yet. The ones who have caused accidents and claim to be good drivers are however still a mystery to me. So with all that evidence, I have come to understand that one of the definitive tests to check if a person is male or not, is to question/threaten their driving skills. I’m a good driver, by the way.
One topic that was discussed a while ago was “What would you do if you had a good friend who had posed for nude photographs for a big publication?” I’m sure a variation on the response of “I’d go check the pictures out” would be uttered by a good percentile of the population, followed by said action. But what if that friend had requested that you don’t check it out? What if you’re really good friends that respect each other even though around half the subscribing nation have seen them naked but not you. Would the pressure get to you? Would curiosity kill the cat or just choke the chicken? What would you do? A lot of factors come into play here, such as whether you fancy the pants off them in the first place and whether or not your chances for getting a live preview are good anyway. Regardless of whether I had a crush of hydraulic proportions on them or not, I’d respect their wishes. I’d have to question her reasons for asking that of me and search for justification, but nevertheless deliver on my word. It’s a good thing I don’t have friends that would rub it in my face and tease me about it daily. Oh drat, yes they would.
Ex-girlfriends and ex-boyfriends aside, it must be pretty weird to have seen people you know au naturele. I wonder how the friends and good friends of glamour models and other people who take their clothes off for a living on a regular basis deal with it. Leonard was in a spin-off of this situation recently where he found someone he was once close to gracing the pages of FHM. Even though they weren’t full-on nude shots (they were bikini and underwear shots), it wouldn’t require a lay person the imagination of Escher to wonder what lies beneath. Though she obviously looked great, he was shocked and didn’t read the accompanying article even though they no longer speak to each other despite having been close in the past. I can’t even begin to imagine how I’d react in the same situation. Shocked would be a good guess, especially if the girl I once knew was bashful. But I’d be supportive. Would I buy a copy of that issue? You bet your ass I would. I said I’d be supportive. For old time’s sake, of course.
Maybe I used to be blind to it, but nowadays I’m noticing art appearing on sides of buildings. I guess London is trying to get more like San Francisco with the street art. The sky was bluer than normal too. It was a good day.
Got to dash. Have to go outside and try to see Mars.
